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What Happens if You Miscarry a Surrogate Baby?
Posted on February 5, 2021 by GSHC in Blog, Surrogate Resources, Surrogacy Process for Surrogates, IP Resources, Surrogacy Process for IPs
Miscarriages are probably more common than you’d expect—with approximately 10-25% of all pregnancies ending in one. When a miscarriage does happen during the surrogacy process, it can be quite an emotional experience for both the intended parents and the surrogate. Not to mention it can feel like a setback but know that you’ll have the full support of your surrogacy agency and doctor to help you through this difficult time and decide the next steps.
What Happens During a Miscarriage?
A miscarriage is the early termination of a pregnancy that occurs naturally or because of medical need. Depending on your specific situation and timeline, your doctor will present a few treatment options which include expectant management, medical treatment, or surgical treatment.
With expectant management, the miscarriage progresses naturally on its own. The tissue will leave your body in about two to four weeks with some women experiencing mild to moderate discomfort or high emotions. To speed up the process, you can also take prescribed medication. This method may cause additional cramping, but is usually resolved within 24 hours. A minor surgical treatment, commonly known as a D&C (dilation and curettage), is also an option. With surgery, there is little downtime and also makes it easy to test the fetal tissue for any abnormalities that could have been the cause of the miscarriage.
What Happens After a Miscarriage?
It can be difficult to understand why miscarriages happen when everything seemed to be working out as planned. Many surrogates feel it was their fault and that their intended parents will be disappointed in them. However, most miscarriages can’t be prevented. Chromosomal abnormalities are the leading cause, accounting for about 50% of all miscarriages.
In addition to your body’s physical recovery, make sure to pay attention to your emotions during this time. Miscarriage can often be a sad and painful experience for surrogates and intended parents.
Physical & Emotional Recovery
It’s essential to take the time to recover after a miscarriage—both physically and emotionally. The length of time will vary depending on how far along you were in your pregnancy.
Many surrogates report that they feel a wide range of emotions throughout this time period, with most expressing a deep grievance for their intended parents' loss. Sometimes your feelings may be difficult and more complicated to process because you are carrying someone else’s baby.
GSHC is always here to help you cope with these emotions and, whenever you’re ready, prepare for your next embryo transfer,.
Navigating the Relationship with Your Intended Parents
Although a miscarriage typically can’t be prevented, many surrogates still feel they are responsible simply because it is their body. But the truth is that it’s natural. Of course, your intended parents will not only feel the emotional weight of the loss but will often feel compassion for you and wonder about what’s in store for their future.
Communication between you and your intended parents may slow down after a miscarriage. This is completely normal, as everyone is healing from a devastating experience. Feel free to reach out to us at GSHC Surrogacy if you need guidance or insight into how they might be healing.
Will a Miscarriage Affect Your Ability to Get Pregnant Again?
Most surrogate pregnancies will result in a healthy baby within the first three transfers. But just because you had a miscarriage does not mean your surrogacy journey is over. It’s a good possibility that one of your subsequent transfers will be successful.
A miscarriage should not affect your ability to become pregnant again. In fact, the number of transfers you will complete is usually included in your surrogacy contract, so when you’re fully recovered emotionally and physically, it’s likely that you will have another embryo transferred.
Determining Your Next Steps after Miscarriage
After your miscarriage is over and you’ve taken the steps to recover both physically and mentally, you will have follow-up conversations with your doctor, surrogacy specialist, and your intended parents to discuss all of your options moving forward. If it’s considered safe for you to become pregnant again and if there are additional embryos, most surrogates and intended parents will attempt another transfer together. Many surrogates that have had miscarriages will go on to have a successful pregnancy and deliver happy, healthy babies for their intended parents.
Are you ready to begin your surrogacy journey? Complete our Surrogate Intake Form to get started.