Before you decide to start the journey to become a gestational surrogate and help someone welcome a new member to their family, ask yourself if you’ve considered the opinion of one important person, your partner. Your partner is the most vital person in your support system. Like yourself, your partner probably has some concerns about the surrogacy process and the toll it can take on your relationship and life. If you and your partner know what issues and life changes to expect, it will be easier to navigate conversations and reduce anxieties. Here are some commitments your partner will need to make during your surrogacy.
Increase In Responsibilities
Beyond moral and emotional support, your partner’s daily responsibilities will increase. Pregnancy side effects can cause you to depend on your partner more heavily for childcare and help with day-to-day tasks. Your partner should also be available to drive you to and from appointments, often in different cities or states. In addition to a flexible schedule and an understanding employer, your partner must be willing to help with medical injections and assist with daily duties if bed rest is prescribed.
Medical and Psychological Screenings
There are also a few strict rules and commitments required of spouses. Intended parents need a surrogate’s married partner to be medically and psychologically screened by the IVF clinic. Unmarried partners may also be screened depending on the intended parents’ preference.
If you and your partner are legally married, they will be required to be a part of the gestational surrogacy agreement between you and your intended parents. This involves including them in the contract review appointment with your legal representation, ensuring they also understand the terms of the agreement (including their entitled companion lost wages), and providing their written signature to the final draft.
When it comes to intimacy, doctors will ask you and your partner to abstain from sex while on fertility drugs to avoid a surprise pregnancy. After successful fertilization, the doctor may also prescribe abstinence during the surrogacy to prevent additional pregnancies or injury. Lack of intimacy can be tough on any relationship, so it’s essential to keep the lines of communication open and honest during the entire process.
Present During Delivery and Postpartum Help
Partners may be involved in a pre or post-birth process to establish the baby’s legal parents. This will involve additional paperwork to complete in order to finalize the parentage judgment for the intended parents. Your partner is also allowed in the hospital room during delivery. After giving birth, your partner will help with household duties and childcare as you rest and recuperate.
Developing An Emotional Connection to the Baby
Some partners worry about an emotional connection developing between the surrogate and the embryo. The embryo is conceived medically through IVF and without any sexual contact. Your partner can be reassured that a surrogate is a helper, not a mother. A surrogate sees the baby as a gift for the intended parents that she is helping create.
A surrogate’s partner is an integral part of the surrogacy process. They provide support through childcare, transportation help, and reassurance. Your partner helps you maintain your home life and relationship as you embark on this surrogacy chapter of your life. Once your partner is on board and you’re ready to begin your journey, reach out to GSHC Surrogacy Agency to apply.